Friday, June 16, 2006

Schools & Tribulations, Part I

I had someone ask me what a school could have done when my kids were having problems. I don’t know, maybe call. During Bombshell’s grammar school year and Scamp throughout his school terms in this town, I was spending a lot of time at the counselor’s office. Don’t get me wrong please; I liked school myself. I have the greatest respect for teachers. They put a lot of time and effort into educating our young. But now let me tell you some of the things that happened and maybe you can make a suggestion that will make me feel better about our schools in the county.

When we first moved here Bombshell was enrolled in the elementary school just down the street. It was a brand new school and she loved going there, at first. She was put into a class that she loved and a teacher she really liked and respected. It was also an advanced class. When they felt there were too many students in the class she was moved. Okay, I have no problem with that.

In this new class was a click of little girls. I don’t know why they invited Bombshell into their click; it obviously was not because they liked her. And apparently the teacher had issues too. It was during the Kuwait invasion that all this was going on and her class was writing letters to the GI’s. Bombshell really enjoyed that and so when they had to write a story around Christmas, she wrote on about Saddam attacking the North Pole. And when it looked like all might be lost, the Marines saved the day. I got a note that this was not appropriate subject matter for an eleven year old.

Now back to the girls, they would relentlessly tease Bombshell, and when she would complain to the teacher, the teacher would listen to what each of the girls had to say then tell Bombshell she was being ridiculous. It got to the point that I told Bombshell to talk to her counselor, which she did. I got a call from the counselor to approve Bombshell and the girls meeting with the counselor to see if they could work things out. I wholeheartedly agreed. At this point I still trusted the teachers and educators to take care of my little girl. Bombshell was still coming home in tears because what was happening was that the girls would say what the counselor wanted to hear and once they were out of the room, they would start in again.

But the really bad part came when, Bombshell made mention in class one time that she wished she had never been born. Instead of calling Pan or me (they said they were a long distant phone calls; blatant lie #1), the teacher and the counselor called HRS. The teacher and counselor told HRS that Bombshell threatened to kill herself (blatant lie #2). Because they made no effort to contact us, my family had to endure six months of grueling interviews and surprise visits from HRS. It was also during this time we started to receive phones threatening Bombshell; asking if we knew where she was; or if we knew what was going to happen to her. We had to have a tap put on the phone and guess what? It turned out to be the girls from school. As they were calling from the next county over though the Sheriff’s department couldn’t do anything except to call the parents. This information was given to HRS, by us and the sheriff’s department and when their interviews were over, the concluded there was some problem, but they could not determine if it was us or the school. You can make your own conclusion, I made mine.

Side note: about HRS, it was grueling but I am glad that there is an establishment to look out after the welfare of children.

Okay enough of the repressed feelings for one day. Will continue later.

2 comments:

Mrs_Who said...

O.M.G. I hate that you went through this. I am a teacher, but I find the school's actions misguided, at the very least. And I teach in an area where kids' are dealing with serious socio-economic issues, and HRS makes regular visi. FYI, in many states, legally, it is the counselor who has to call HRS..it is his/her job. Teachers refer serious problems to the counselor and are not supposed to call HRS themselves. But many teachers over-react, while others don't do anything.

On a side note, were those other girls' parents 'big' in the school or community? Some principals/districts won't go up against that...sad, but all too true...

Gabby Faye said...

The squeaky wheel gets the oil and it sounds like the other girls' parents might have "squeaked" louder than you did, or were more "influential".

When my neighbor's daughter was having problems in cheerleading with the other bi****s, her mother (single and full time employed) volunteered as the team Mother so she could be at all the functions. I hear that helped, but you just can't do that if it isn't an organization.

I know students, especially girls, have lied through their teeth to me but I have also had LOTS of parents swear their child "doesn't lie". Bull! Every child will lie to get their way. I also hear them compare having their parents "whipped" into doing whatever the child wants. You just can't reach those children, but you can keep trying to save the others from the clutches of the "mean girls". Boys are so much more physical and open, but not better.