Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Hurricane tribulations

Received the following email from a friend and since Hurricane season officially starts tomorrow felt it might be worth passing along.

June 1st arrives tomorrow and officially starts this year’s Atlantic Hurricane Season.

Any day now, you're going to turn on the TV and see a weather person pointing to some radar blob out in the Gulf of Mexico and making two basic meteorological points:

(1) There is no need to panic.
(2) We could all be killed.

Yes, hurricane season is an exciting time to be in Florida. If you're new to the area, you're probably wondering what you need to do to prepare for the possibility that we'll get hit by "the big one.''

Based on our experiences, we recommend that you follow this simple three-step hurricane preparedness plan:

STEP 1: Buy enough food and bottled water to last your family for at least three days.

STEP 2: Put these supplies into your car.

STEP 3: Drive to Nebraska and remain there until Thanksgiving.

Unfortunately, statistics show that most people will not follow this sensible plan. Most people will foolishly stay here in Florida.

We'll start with one of the most important hurricane preparedness items:

HOMEOWNERS' INSURANCE: If you own a home, you must have hurricane insurance. Fortunately, this insurance is cheap and easy to get, as long as your home meets two basic requirements:

(1) It is reasonably well-built, and
(2) It is located in Nebraska.

Unfortunately, if your home is located in Florida, or any other area that might actually be hit by a hurricane, most insurance companies would prefer not to sell you hurricane insurance, because then they might be required to pay YOU money, and that is certainly not why they got into the insurance business in the first place.

So you'll have to scrounge around for an insurance company, which will charge you an annual premium roughly equal to the replacement value of your house. At any moment, this company can drop you like used dental floss.

Since Hurricane Andrew, I have had an estimated 27 different home-insurance companies. This week, I'm covered by the Bob and Big Stan Insurance Company, under a policy which states that, in addition to my premium, Bob and Big Stan are entitled, on demand, to my kidneys.

Shutters: Your house should have hurricane shutters on all the windows, all the doors, and -- if it's a major hurricane -- all the toilets. There are several types of shutters, with advantages and disadvantages:

Plywood Shutters: The advantage is that, because you make them yourself, they're cheap. The disadvantage is that, because you make them yourself, they will fall off.

Sheet-Metal Shutters: The advantage is that these work well, once you get them all up. The disadvantage is that once you get them all up, your hands will be useless bleeding stumps, and it will be December.

Roll-Down Shutters: The advantages are that they're very easy to use, and will definitely protect your house. The disadvantage is that you will have to sell your house to pay for them.

"Hurricane Proof” Windows: These are the newest wrinkle in hurricane protection: They look like ordinary windows, but they can withstand hurricane winds! You can be sure of this, because the salesman says so. He lives in Nebraska.

"HURRICANE PROOFING” YOUR PROPERTY: As the hurricane approaches, check your yard for movable objects like barbecue grills, planters, patio furniture, visiting relatives, etc.; you should, as a precaution, throw these items into your swimming pool (if you don't have a swimming pool, you should have one built immediately). Otherwise, the hurricane winds will turn these objects into deadly missiles.

EVACUATION ROUTE: If you live in a low-lying area, you should have an evacuation route planned out. (To determine whether you live in a low-lying area, look at your driver's license; if it says "Florida" you live in a low-lying area.) The purpose of having an evacuation route is to avoid being trapped in your home when a major storm hits. Instead, you will be trapped in a gigantic traffic jam several miles from your home, along with two hundred thousand other evacuees. So, as a bonus, you will not be lonely.

HURRICANE SUPPLIES: If you don't evacuate, you will need a mess of supplies. Do not buy them now! Florida tradition requires that you wait until the last possible minute, then go to the supermarket and get into vicious fights with strangers over who gets the last can of SPAM.

In addition to food and water, you will need the following supplies:

23 flashlights. At least $167 worth of batteries that turn out, when the power goes out, to be the wrong size for the flashlights.

Bleach. (No, I don't know what the bleach is for. NOBODY knows what the bleach is for. But it's traditional, so GET some!)

A 55-gallon drum of underarm deodorant.

A big knife that you can strap to your leg. (This will be useless in a hurricane, but it looks cool.)

A large quantity of raw chicken, to placate the alligators. (Ask anybody who went through Andrew; after the hurricane, there WILL be irate alligators.)

$35,000 in cash or diamonds so that, after the hurricane passes, you can buy a generator from a man with no discernible teeth.

Of course these are just basic precautions. As the hurricane draws near, it is vitally important that you keep abreast of the situation by turning on your television and watching TV reporters in rain slickers stand right next to the ocean and tell you over and over how vitally important it is for everybody to stay away from the ocean.

Good luck and remember: It's great living in paradise! Those of you who aren't here yet, you should come. Really!


While this is suppose to be amusing (and it is), it is also pretty accurate.

Work Ethics tribulations

I probably should upload some pictures or scrapbook pages, but you know, that would actually entail working. Doing something. Making choices. The things we use to tell the kids would make them fine upstanding citizens, proud to do their civic duty, work until they drop.

Navy Nuke once accused me of instilling excellent work ethics in him. Like it was a bad thing or something…. Anyone who has ever seen my house is probably thinking “excellent work ethics, right…” But there is a difference between work ethics and organizational skills. And I must admit, I sorely lack in the organizational skills department. Oddybobo should be able to commiserate with me. Maybe we should head out for a drink and forget the house.

Grandfather's tribulations

Thank you, Grandfather Harvey for the warm welcome.

You wouldn’t want to be my daughter? How disappointing. And here I was contemplating all the fun times we could have shopping together.

Bug is going to help me out on putting the list near the top of the sidebar just for you dear grandfather. We all know how it is when your memory starts to lag. Will also be a lot easier than popping back and forth don’t you think?

That sure is an EM3 patch on Nuke’s shoulder. You have a good eye for being a grandfather.

Nature's tribulations

Wednesday’s Blog Prompt: “What is the neatest thing you have ever seen in nature or made by nature?" suggested by ArtcMom

I can’t really think of one particular thing that I have seen in nature or made by nature that is the “neatest.” Sunsets on the boat come to mind first, but then there is the Grand Canyon, Red Wood Forest and Garden Spiders.

Then there was the time when I lived on the edge of the Black Water Reservation and had to take care of a baby deer for a short while. Guess the ranger figured since I had a baby already one more wouldn’t hurt. Then there was the time at Bok Towers in Florida, where the animals would just come up to you. How neat is that?

The beaches and autumns in Massachusettes. Or the caverns in Illinois and Missouri. Lake Tahoe in California. How about the Petrified Forest? Maybe the white sand Beaches of Florida. The rice paddies of China and the man-made carvings of the side of a hill in Hong Kong.

No, there is just not one thing I could point to and say “that is the neatest thing I have seen made by nature.”

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Computer Space Tribulations

Tuesday morning blog prompt: Let's get to know each other some more! Describe your scrap space/computer area! Where in your home is it? Do you decorate around it? Anything meaningful sitting on your desk? Where are you?

My computer space, huh? Well, it's a desk. Not an extremely big one, but not small either. It is filled with computer books, notebooks, disks, baby medicine and hardware. The medicine way up top so I can see it and reach it, but he can't. I keep the mail stacked around the monitor. Pretty much everything else is in the three cubbies. Except the hardware of course.

Currently my computer is located in my living room. Along with Pan's computer and Princess Z's laptop. No it is not a big living room. After the computers there is only room for an entertainment center and a couch. I have a picture of Scamp and Honey, as well one of baby Princess Z on the door. Other than that it is pretty ulitarian (and I have probably spelled this one wrong, but none of the spell checks seem to think it is a word).

Oh, and my hairbrush is hidden from Princess and Indiana somewhere on my desk. Now where did I put it?

Monday, May 29, 2006

Playing with new camera

Yesterday we took the kids to a little park in Valp. Insert thought: I didn't know Valp. had 11 parks. Quite a bit for a town of only 6000 or so. Enough digressing and back to the playing.

There is still a lot that I have to read about the camera but it was still fun to try it out on a lark. Princess Z was the perfect model when she wasn't "posing." Finally I just had to wait until she was absorbed in something else

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Princess Z

Indiana B really got into the playground although it took a couple of encouragements to get on to the playset. Once there, there was not stopping the imp. Would he use the little slide? Noooooo, he had to go down the big kids slide.

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Indiana B

Memorial Day Blogs

I will probably add to this during the day, but for now, here are three blogs about Memorial Day you need to check out.

One Happy Dog Speaks (this is under the Carnival of Recipes heading)The Pages of Our Crazy Life
Lauraloub's Scrapping

Memorial Day

Memorial Day. A day in which we honor those who have or are giving of their time and lives to secure our safety in an imperfect world. I have had in the last couple of generations, many family members who served in the Armed Forces, my father, U.S. Air Force; my father-in-law, U.S. Navy; two brothers-in-law, U. S. Marine Corps; an uncle, U.S. Marine Corps; a cousin, U.S. Army. Fortunately for me, while several of these family members served during the Vietnam conflict, none lost their lives in a war effort.

I have two boys. Both of whom joined the Armed Forces prior to 9/11. Sometimes when I think about it, if I had known what the future was going to bring, would I have still expounded on the virtues of a military career? I like to think I would have. I am proud of my boys. Although each time one has to be placed in danger, my heart skips a beat (or several). I love my boys and praise the choices they have made in their adult lives.

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Scamp and Nuke at Scamp's
graduation from Boot Camp

On May 16, George W. Bush, declared that Memorial Day, May 29, 2006, as a Day of Prayer for permanent peace. So whether you believe in God or a higher being or not, please take a moment, to remember all those who have given of their lives, those who are doing so and those who will follow in their footsteps.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Tribulations on Voting

Well it appears after several days the vote is in.

Bug Brains has won out by a large (and only) margin. So BIL looks like your are Bug Brains after all. Love you.

Trees and Tribulations

I took a gander over to ArtcMom's place this morning where she had written a piece about her son and a coffee table. It brought back memories of a similar nature. One about a son and a tree.

Scamp was out playing in the backyard when the friend he was with came running in ashen white and jabbering about a tree falling on Scamp. Then in came Scamp with blood pouring down his head, front, back and sides. Pan gathered him up and took him to the emergency room while I located the other two and then left to me him. Fortunately the damage was limited and he only had to have some stitches.

But you tell me how a tree just falls? It was a fairly healthy pine tree. It had not been cut in any way. And while it was not large by oak tree standards, it wasn't a sapling either. Anyway it is a reminder that live is short and accidents can happen in the most unusual way. Hug your kid today and keep them away from trees.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Tribulations for My Sister

and her efforts in the Carnival of Recipes. So for vw, here is my son's favorite recipe that I use to make for him.

Mom's Chicken Marinara

4 Chicken breast halves, deboned
4 ounces Mozzarella, grated and divided into fourths
2 tablespoons grated parmesan cheese
2 cups marinara sauce

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

pound chicken breasts to 1/2 inch. Sprinkle 1 ounce grated mozzarella cheese on each half and roll up.
Place in baking dish and cover with marinara sauce. Sprinkle parmesan cheese over top.

Bake for 30-40 minutes at 350 degrees.

Serve with noodles, salad and rolls.

Late Mother's Day Tribulations

I’m excited and thrilled. I received a mother’s day gift from Nuke earlier in the week. It was a battery charger for my Sony digital. It was one that you put the battery in and then plugged it in. I was just wishing that it had come before I left for Orlando as it would have been a lot less cumbersome than the charger that came with the camera.

But then yesterday another package arrived. I knew one was coming, but I really thought it was a cd or two of pictures of Hong Kong.

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So when I opened the package all I could say was “Oh my God.” Princess Z told me if I said it again she was going to scream. He sent me his Sony DSC-F707. I am so psyched about using it. Now I just need to get out and try it. Of course I will have to read the manual (which by the way did not come with it and I had to download it).

I am definitely looking forward to this weekend and a photo shoot somewhere.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Art and Tribulation

DSP Blog Prompt of the Day: Is creating "beautiful art" more important than the process of creating?

This one brought back memories of a time gone by and I realized then (and now) that the process is definitely more important than the creation. All of my children (and now my grandchildren) have had access to any and all art supplies that I could find. Nuke and Bombshell have won awards for their art. Nuke even has a degree in fine art. But it was Scamp's artwork that drove home how much more important creating is than the final creation, at least to my mind.

He was in elementary school and one of the classes you have to take is art. Which by the way is graded, go figure. One day he had drawn a field with a horse and fence. But it was not exactly like the teacher wanted so he got an F on it. Now explain to me how you can get an F in art? At least the "art" part. It is one thing if you are being tested on the types of art and who did them.

Anyway, because of this teacher's flawed teaching, he has never been as interested in art as the other two. The really sad thing is that it was a great picture. Art truly is in the eye of the beholder, so the final creation cannot be as important and the process and love that goes into creating it.

Well that's my opinion anyway.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Morning Sickness Tribulations

DSP Blog Prompt: What were your first thoughts when you got up this morning?

When you wake at 2:30 with a headache from that place beyond limbo, the only thought is "Where the "blank" is my Excedrine. Stumbling blindly from the bedroom to the kitchen, only running into the wall once, I managed to wrap my fingers around that miracle of headache relief. Only thing is no matter what you take it still takes about 20 minutes to kick. So I just stayed up. Going to bed early tonight though.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Till Next Time Tribulations

Good-bye is the DSP blog prompt of the day. I know I have had my share.

I am not a cry in your face good-byer; but if it is one of my children as soon as I am out of sight the tears start. Then I have to find someplace to be alone for a long, long time.

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ScampMarine leaving

I have had to say good-bye to both of my boys when they left for boot camp. Then when they were both transferred to West Pac. Scamp spent his first couple of years in Okinawa; while Nuke was stationed in Hawaii aboard a nuclear submarine. Now Nuke is Guam and Scamp is in Hawaii. Fortunately for me, both boys do keep in touch.

I have only had to say good-bye permanently to one person who meant the world to me and I do not relish the idea that I may have to do it again. vw bug and I lost our father two years ago and I still won't say good-bye. I know he is here.

Birthing Tribulations

A Big Thank You to everyone. And I guess even vw. But if she thinks I'm going to call her 'mom' she is sadly mistaken. Are you LISTENING bug? I am taller, bigger and older than you and can whoop your arse any day of the week, so don't expect me to call you anything other than bug.

Pan was trying to help me come up with something to call bug's better half when I just arbitrarily (and I just realized I really can spell), called him brains. Pan suggested Bug's Mate but when he saw the bug brains said I should have changed it to bug's brain. So what do you think?

a. Brains
b. bug's mate
c. bug's brain

Personally I think he would prefer a or c. If you think about it, in the insect world most females eat their male counterparts. Eww Eww, I'm not even going there.....

Now for the characters who will probably appear in future episodes of Tink's Tribulations (you will need to print these out and keep them handy so I can call on you to remind me of who is who):

Pan - dearest hubby and bestest friend
NavyNuke - our oldest son
ScampMarine - middle child, youngest son and father to Ballerina
Bombshell - youngest child and only daughter; mother to Princess Z and Indiana B
J1 - Bombshell's ex-husband and father to Princess Z
J2 - Bombshell's ex-boyfriend and father to Indiana B
Honey - Scamp's wife and mother to Ballerina
Princess Z - oldest grandchild, daughter of Bombshell and J1
Ballerina - second grandchild, daughter of Scamp and Honey
Indiana B - third grandchild, son of Bombshell and J2
J3 through J? - Bombshell's ex boyfriends (and there is a reason for the J. Everyone of them has a first name that starts with J)

Other main characters:
Mom (aka mamma or mawmaw); ddpup (younger sis); Bear (ddpup hubby); vw (baby sis); tater and tot (baby sis' kids).

And if you read this blog, you are fair game (or is that fodder) to be included.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Bug Brains Tribulations

Bug may not post pictures of her and her better half, but I will. Oh, if you think looking at the bigger pic will give you a better idea of how bug and brains look, it won't.

Bug on her way down
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Brains on his way down
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Yep, Bug may end up regretting this. (Does this make them the Bug Brains family?)

Pets and Tribulations

The DSP Blog Prompt for today is pets. First memories of pets.

First one I remember wasn't even my own, but dad's. I think it may have been a Weimeraner, but not entirely sure about that. We were living in Massachusettes and I remember the house looked like a giant could live in it. Dad would have coffee with me in the kitchen when he could. Well, he had coffee and I had a cup of milk with just enough coffee to change the color of the milk.

But anyway his dog. It was big and it wouldn't let me out of my bedroom. Worked much better than a gate.

Of course, I could have this memory totally wrong, as I was only two at the time.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Scents and Tribulations

DSP's blog prompt for this week is scents. More specifically a scent that reminds you of childhood or has a strong emotional connection to is. One thing I have discovered is, that it is very difficult to recall any scent when you have a cold and your nose is stopped up.

But I shall buck up and put my great (or not so) mind to it. I guess if I really think about it hard, it would have to be the scent of burning hair. Believe me that would bring back memories to anyone, especially if it is your hair that is on fire. I must be honest though and admit that someone else had to tell me it was on fire.

We (mom, dad, ddpup, vw and I, along with another family) had gone picnicing somewhere in northern California along this beautiful creek. The menfolk built a fire and we'um kids gathered around. Silly me had my back to it. Word of warning, if you have long hair and you are outdoors DO NOT put your back to a fire. Yep, my hair caught on fire.

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Pitiful Tribulations

Pitiful isn't the little tyke? Don't feel too sorry for him.

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He is suppose to be sleeping and in my bed no less.

Teenage Tribulations

Do you have a teenage daughter? Want to drive her insane? Then you have come to the right place for advice.

My daughter, bombshell, is now a mother herself , but once she was a teenage daughter. And they are loads of fun to have around if you know what to do. Case in point:

In my recollection she was about 14-15 years of age and I had to take her shopping for underwear. We are at a store in the mall, just browsing, when she spies a couple of cute boys coming our way. Desperately trying to make a good impression, she moves a bit away from me (hey what self-respecting teenager wants to be seen with their mother in the underwear section of a store.)

Well I am not just any mother, she found out to her embarassment. As they approached closer, I pulled out a pair of thong underwear and showed them to her. Shaking her head no, she tried to ease behind a display. Not to be thwarted, I very loudly said "But you always borrow mine."

Tink's Tales of Tribulations

Arrgghh. I'm insane. I have agreed to spend the weekend with vw and her three boys. Yep I said three and if you can't figure it out, shame on you.

Tater and Tot have decided my name is suppose to come between every word they say. And Tot has decided that Uncle Pan is his new best friend.