Tribulations of a Petty Dictator

Pan here. Tink has graciously given me a set of keys, but I think she left more detailed instructions than Mrs. Who possibly left HC. Technically I think she did it because I am her political conscience, wherein while she writes her humanitarian conscience sets in and just forbids her to say anything that may be misconstrued politically. More to the point though, she retains the rights to edit anything I write BEFORE it is published. Such a task master.

With all of that in mind, here are our views on the newest political world disaster:

When you actually think about it, you almost feel sorry for poor little Kim Jong II of North Korea . I mean,

1. Everyone knows he’s insane, including those around him that he leads.
   
2. There’s no way he could ever get help for this condition, I mean would you go up to the absolute dictator of your nation and say excuse me great leader, but I think you need to see a psychiatrist?
   
3. Obviously, the worst job in north Korea right now would be being the great leader’s translator. You’ve just defied the U.S. , your closest ally China , and the entire rest of the world by launching a test of your long range missile. You’re watching CNN on satellite, and ask your translator for what the U.S commentators are saying about the U.S. reaction. Do you:
   
   
   
   1. Tell the truth, and laugh, Ha ha ha ha, they all think you’re insane. They can’t understand how anyone could be so stupid as to launch a long range missile on their day of independence, and expect anything good to come from it, Ha ha ha, err why are you telling the guards to take me away?
      
   2. Lie like hell. Wow, the Americans are just stunned by your awesome power and might. They eagerly hope their president will now show proper respect for you and come begging for terms of peace. (While thinking, *%@! How am I going to smuggle my whole family out of here before someone stupid enough to tell him the truth comes along?)
4. So here you are, thinking everyone thinks you’re great and powerful, because no one that actually wants to live will tell you otherwise. As far as you know, you’ve just made great strides in your relations with the U.S. Meanwhile, the back channels between the U.S. and China , the conversations are probably approaching: “OK, if you can’t reign him in and keep him under control, we will do something about it. We aren’t going to wait till he can actually make those things work and top them with a nuclear war head.” And the Chinese have got to be thinking, *%@! How can we get rid of this crazy and get someone with some common sense in charge?
   
5. And while your thinking you’ve just made a really powerful statement, you’re allies and enemies alike are all trying to come up with a way to take you out before you do something really stupid.

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